solace; comfort in despair

2007-03-26T20:38:00.000+08:00

hey guys sorry i know this blog is quite dead.. if you dont know im in aus alreaaady and studying. heres what ive learnt so far!

3/25/2007 10:29:34 PM Melbourne!** i heard first year biomed/dentistry and med same sub?
3/25/2007 10:29:39 PM solace ** dunno bout that
3/25/2007 10:29:51 PM solace ** but they emphasize INFeCTioN CConTROL
3/25/2007 10:29:55 PM solace ** dont spread STDs jun wei
3/25/2007 10:31:10 PM Melbourne!** haha you make me sound like a mosquito
3/25/2007 10:31:28 PM solace ** hahhahahha
3/25/2007 10:31:35 PM solace ** mosquitos dont spread STDs
3/25/2007 10:32:08 PM Melbourne!** haha oh rite
3/25/2007 10:32:20 PM solace ** by being a prick .. you can!
3/25/2007 10:32:23 PM solace ** get it?? hahaha
3/25/2007 10:32:39 PM Melbourne! ** ...........................
3/25/2007 10:32:41 PM Melbourne! ** go study lah
3/25/2007 10:32:42 PM solace ** HAHA

this is some fine medical education! :D

2006-10-22T19:27:00.000+08:00

i think my head feels like a cauldron brimming full of doubt, self consciousness, worry and hopelessness. probably not a healthy concoction eh? i dont know.. it could be the whole mixture of the uh.. exam pressure, sensitive college issues and stuff. heres something funny:

par·a·noi·a (păr'ə-noi'ə) pronunciation
n.

1. A psychotic disorder characterized by delusions of persecution with or without grandeur, often strenuously defended with apparent logic and reason.

something she pointed out the other night prompted me to do some thinking. why the hell was i saying those things? it seemed as if.. i had something to prove.. not to her, but perhaps myself.

the only other person to have said something similar was back in form 5. he said i never wanted to be proven wrong.. and found difficulty in accepting the fact that i was. come to think about it, it does have some truth to it now..

well i guess thats something else to wor.. constructively think about to improve on.

on a lighter note, there are two observations i made in the hospital over the past couple of months ive been there that ive been meaning to blog about;

#1 unity
i was observing 2 young indian children who were playing around the waiting area.. their dad was obviously trying his best to restrain them in nicest way possible. they were practically bouncing around with that sky high metabolic rate. a malay boy with an older guardian later came into the waiting area. the malay boy had this cheap handheld videogame as well as Rocky strawberry sticks. the indian boy peered curiously at the videogame while the malay boy was at it. the malay boy immediatly offered to let the indian boy play it.. it was an amazing sight! the way the indian children were apprehensively viewing the malay boy to see whether his intentions were sincere.

the malay boy offered the Rockys as well.. how could any kid resist? while they indulged in those together, i looked at the indian dad, who sighed and gave me a knowing look.. but i was truly amazed at how there was no prejudice whatsoever.. and how they really seemed like Malaysians.

#2 true love
there was this elderly chinese couple, a man who was on a wheelchair and a woman who was standing behind him. it seemed ordinary enough.. until i heard audible choking and gagging noises from their direction. the man was having difficulty breathing and was throwing up all forms of spittle and phlegm into a metal container. some got on his chin and neck as well. as i looked in closely (as much as i could without causing discomfort) the woman seemed older than she looked, and she diligently cleaned up after him.. offering him a massage as well, while ignoring the attention from onlookers as he continued to fill the metal container.

2006-09-01T20:21:00.000+08:00

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really funny video!

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2006-04-14T19:55:00.000+08:00

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ahh!

2006-03-18T22:29:00.000+08:00

haha okay long time since i posted as usual.. soo yeah got my spm results, a little disappointing but ahh.. what to do eh? nevertheless.. im very grateful to my teachers who gave me guidance all along the way.. esp mr hew and mr lee. thankyou thankyou!

spent my hols from SAM mostly on two things.. ie spending time with yv and hospital attachment@sjmc! according to my dad im supposed to keep a log of what i did during that time in the hosp.. so ill write wtv comes to mind before it all goes

day1 tues
spent most of the day in the laboratory dept learning how it functions as a support tool for doctors to help diagnose patients. it goes sth like this : doctor sees patient and based on oral examination recommends specific tests to be run in the lab(if he/she cannot already tell what is wrong), results of tests return to doctors = prognosis
this experience was nothing really new to me since ive already seen how a lab works. the only diff was that sjmc's lab was by far one of the most advanced labs in the country and could run a wide variety of tests. if you cant run something here, it probably has to go overseas.
afternoon was the dissection of various organs that have been removed from the body.. usually to extract tumor samples and investigate them. included kidneys, uteruses and so on. not for the faint of heart

day2 wed
half day at the imaging dept. saw how doctors used equipment like the ultrasound and mammograms to help discover any change or growth in abnormal tissue.. nothing much nothing much

day3 thurs
was at the bloodbank to learn more about how blood is collected and grouped. did this before as well.. all blood has to be screened for any diseases before transfused etc etc. afternoon went on a general tour of hospital to learn how all of their departments integrate together to function as a single organism that makes healthy happy people out of sick patients =)

yea so thats about it.. and i met two interesting individuals; gayathiri and johann.. haha it wasnt a bore listening to u guys talk all the way. see u guys mond ! haha

andd.. yesterday till this morning was good too.. sighhh.. i wish i could just turn back time sometimes and live those moments again and againn.. ah well

took some interesting pictures

WOoooooooooooooooOOOooooooooooooooooooooo!!!old couple holding hands in OU!!! yay!!

driving along the sprint highway at about 4.45 in the morning.. it was slightly eerie but peaceful. not used to seeing this place empty.. ever! haha

till next time guys cidoz!

random pics

2006-02-04T13:16:00.000+08:00

just came back from chauffeuring my sister around (man i think im her personal driver now) and lunch and i finally made some good use with my not so good camera on the phone..

this not so clear picture was depicting a relatively old couple(if you look closely he has a bald spot on top of his head, heh) holding hands in the wet market. sorry for bad image resolution.. by the time managed to whip out my phone they were already quite a distance away. its soo rare to find older couples who still have that spark in their relationship.. most of them still just stay together for the sake of doing it.. or for the kids.. etc. i admire these people.. including my uncle and aunty of my cousin yy! haha. a true symbol of undying love! :)

and heres a sexy picture of two sexy looking things! yeaaa mannn! shiny shiny hehe =)

2006-02-02T17:30:00.000+08:00

halo halo everyone..

firstly, happy cny to all you dudes out there.. hope you had a good one. getting pretty lazy to blog nowadays.. haha.. well anyway ive gotten my new car!!(consider it a big ang pow?) buahahaha thats right.. no more public transport for me if i can help it :D look out for me on the road! woot. i still need to brush up on my skill.. had a few close shaves already :o

baah and then theres all the college work.. which im really damn lazy to get on with. our teachers were also kind enough to give us tests right after the hols! roar$!@ having said that the past few days were pretty slow and relaxing.. whole family went out for breakfast daily(which is a extremely rare occurance) and other family-like activities hehhe.

driving on the road.. hmm.. i wonder why most msian drivers are so impatient. chowvi says driving is alot about anticipation(which i still lack at certain times hence the close shaves) and the FEEL. one example is when im approaching a speedbump, i let go of my acc. pedal and let the car roll over the bump from a distance as it slows down w/o braking. drivers behind like to accelerate past me and brake hard just before the bump and go. i call this an inefficient use of petrol and is fairly annoying.. i mean if it was a speeding ambulance then thatd be understandable i guess.. bah!

i shall now write some random thoughts.. hmm.. bad dreams last night.. my previous school was trying to mass murder students.. looking forward to tomorrow.. open housess.. i should do my work.. transmission locks for cars are difficult to find (i went looking around in midvalley for hours!) okay thats it !

ciao!

nickelback - someday

2005-12-29T15:37:00.000+08:00

How the hell did we wind up like this
Why weren't we able
To see the signs that we missed
And try to turn the tables

I wish you'd unclench your fists
And unpack your suitcase
Lately there's been too much of this
Dont think its too late

Nothin's wrong
just as long as
you know that someday I will

Someday, somehow
gonna make it alright but not right now
I know you're wondering when
(You're the only one who knows that)
Someday, somehow
gonna make it alright but not right now
I know you're wondering when

Well i hoped that since we're here anyway
We could end up saying
Things we've always needed to say
So we could end up stringing
Now the story's played out like this
Just like a paperback novel
Lets rewrite an ending that fits
Instead of a hollywood horror

Nothin's wrong
just as long as
you know that someday I will

Someday, somehow
gonna make it alright but not right now
I know you're wondering when
(You're the only one who knows that)
Someday, somehow
gonna make it alright but not right now
I know you're wondering when
(You're the only one who knows that)

some thoughts

2005-12-29T14:49:00.000+08:00

its been about a week since we parted ways. its been about a week since this self-consuming void existed within. its been about a week since all hell broke loose..

i could think of many other ways to describe it.. i'm pretty much still stuck in emotional limbo.. not knowing what move i should make next..

should i be happy that she factored in everything and did this for the greater good? college life.. and beyond that.. our busy schedules.. our different(?!) needs..

that would be the ideal case right?

but.. i can without doubt say otherwise. my heart was shattered that day.. still is in fact. i did meet up with her soon after and we talked.. i felt much better but there was still something lingering after..

she did mention that just maybe in the future things might work out.. the more i prodded on the topic the more melancholic the details seemed to be.. maybe after a long period of time.. maybe after a few more heartbreaks. i cant stand the thought of it. i felt like ive given this all i've got.. perhaps even more. you know this.. and to start everything all over again.. even with another individual so perfect.. i just can't.

you're in ou now.. i want to see you.. although i know that there wont be any radical change of heart.. but i know i should not.. sighh.. every second i hold on t0 pains me.. its like being torn between two different realities.

i just want you to know, no matter how bleak it all seemed when explained all that stuff a few nights ago.. i'm still holding on to you, yvonne..

pangkor

2005-12-19T23:28:00.000+08:00

hey dudes, sorry for a long hiatus.. was busy with enjoying post spm life and lazing around basically.. haha two main events passed since then which are prom day and the pangkor trip! since i dont havee pictures for the first event now i guess ill write about the pangkor thing first:

it alll started DURING our mid year exams (the beginning in fact) when a bunch of us decided to have a vacation during the holidays after spm.. ahha i know pretty early right? we even checked the monsoon seasons and whered they hit etc etc made bookings in advance.. ke semangat an!@ the trip was initially opened up to our entire class.. haha not much response though. its like the people who said would come in the end had something else up instead.. :x

so the day finallyy came and we departed. ill let the pictures speak for me;

*in yvonne chua's comfortable lexus cynus.. clockwise: me, yvonne chua, yvonne tee, jia wei, donny, jun wei

i never got a chance to really thank yvonne chua's driver.. who made 2 trips back and forth to pick us up.. each trip was at least a 5-6 hours drive.. so THANK YOU!

*on ferry en route to pulau pangkor. the journey was shorter than anticipated.. i remember it being longer the last time i went.. which was in form 2. the ferries must've gotten faster; it took about 20 mins.

*trotting along the beach under the hot sun

*king and uh.. queen of the rock!

upon arrival at our resort, we couldnt immediately check in. after dumping our baggages in the lobby.. we were anxious to check out the beach.it was a 5 min walk away. still relatively clean, the water was still clear and free of floating debris! hehe.. we did some stuff on the beach later in the afternoon.. including banana boat, canoeing and others..

next day next day!

*eating at the roadside mamak.. the food was bad@#!!

we had breakfast at the aforementioned place before proceeding for island hopping..

*right before island hopping.. notice the bundles of food!

the islands were cleaner than the main beach.. but a tad overpopulated during that time.. i spent most of the time lazing on the beach while others went snorkeling.. the same afternoon the others also went biking.. an experience i missed out on(i wanted to do it the next day with yv but food poisoning!! ARGH) no more pictures after this point.. we were quite lazy or it was inconvienient to take any..

despite being ill.. id say this trip was a hellota fun! anyway thats it for now.. bye

jw vs wy

2005-10-11T22:29:00.000+08:00

solace says:
ohh
solace says:
haha
solace says:
u have to see every individual teacher?
Breakdown says:
i know its stupid
Breakdown says:
you have to go see teachers and get them to check your marks and sign
solace says:
lol
Breakdown says:
i just thought they would do it for everyone
Breakdown says:
whut about KDU?
solace says:
u mean u have to prepare the forecast paper urself?
Breakdown says:
yup
solace says:
oh.. mushira approached mrs chan
solace says:
who asked her secretary to get the results done and signed by all teachers
solace says:
a security guard delivered the results to mushira
solace says:
=)
solace says:
after the grades were upped of course
Breakdown says:
sigh, i miss paying for good service
solace says:
lololol
solace says:
ive been using the lift alot more too
Breakdown says:
well, i get to sleep more!!
solace says:
haha
Breakdown says:
hah
Breakdown says:
alot more sleep actually
Breakdown says:
and my average schooling hours are around 15 hours a week
solace says:
i dont caree
solace says:
your pitiful attempts to turn this around are in vain
Breakdown says:
i dont ccare about the lift too!!!
solace says:
AHHAHA
Breakdown says:
walking is good exercise!
solace says:
thats what they all say
Breakdown says:
ARRRHH
solace says:
LOL

- pwned! -

2005-10-10T23:30:00.000+08:00

hullo guys,

trials 2 just finished a couple of days back.. i still think we're the one of the only brilliant schools around to actually have 2 mind numbing exams.. i guess you could look at the bright side that we can choose to pick our forecasts from the best of the 2 exams.. hoho there are only approximately 35 more days to spm.. ooh joy, its amazing to me how quick these 2 years have come to pass.. /nostalgia

anyways.. it seems that JPJ has introduced a new ruling regarding applications for probationary driving licenses. all new L license holders will have to undergo the usual amount of training hours before taking the practical exam BUT now have to wait for 1 month before being able to take it. usually people would be able to obtain the P 1-2 weeks after getting the L... ARGH this is damn frustrating, coupled with the fact that i have no choice but to be subjected to the idiocy of this ruling. i have no idea what JPJ aims to acheive by introducing this.. probably by sucking more money from from new drivers by forcing them to take more classes.. bloody hell it was bad enough they raised the age limit for L.. now this!

you must be wondering why i'm as desperate to get the license as much as i want to get laid (ha-ha.. its a joke. laugh).. well ignoring the convienience and independance factor.. its all HERR fault!!@! yes.. that person in the house whos done nothing to contribute towards my emotional needs and well being..im being careful to be specific about that because i have to give credit for all the food and transport ive procured in the past years.. however as you know teens being complex creatures have other needs as well.. which in my case i can safely say were completely neglected. therefore, the lack of this sacred document is causing me to still cling on to this person for minor needs.. who likes it as much as you would like to remove that hideous looking scab on a gangrenous wound. this is the key to my freedom and peace of mind. i cant fucking wait to move out and not see her face (the feeling is mutual) as soon as possible.

well thats it. thanks for reading the rants bye.

yet again..

2005-09-18T20:17:00.000+08:00

it seems that this place is living up to its name sake.. im always here whenever feeling particularly despair-ish.

things seemed to be quite normal of late.. even the rows with my mum have lessened in frequency. then again, i guess you all must be familiar with how life has a knack of being unpredictable at times. was talking to two friends earlier this afternoon.. and i realised how the (little) things you do can affect them in negative like ways..

i admit that i'm only human. i admit i'm not THE ideal person.. i make mistakes just like anyone else. neither this nor my earlier attempts at reasoning is not an attempt to discredit you guys..

suffice to say, i value the importance of companionship.. i honestly never expected anything to look like this.. sigh

2005-09-06T19:31:00.000+08:00

dear blog..

im sorry ive been starving you of much needed content.. so heres a hopefully long post to make up for it..

doh my trial results came back.. not quite up to par. haih.. too much of those games i suppose.. i vow to put in more effort..! and id like to take this chance to list out the names of people that i "hate"; kuok shern for being gay! and nicholas whos studying in every morning has paid off.. haha

yv's birthday just passed.. haha.. what i planned for her [s]probaby[/s] was the biggest thing ive ever done for anyone in my life!! and she enjoyed it hehe(still wondering what your expression was like..) incredulously, my ingenious plan was unscrupulously copied by another individual with amorous intentions.. though i am unduly unsurprised by this occurence, it does bother me at some extent, considering the circumstances...

well anyway.. i dont know how people plan such big and fun parties/surprises and such, its like what i was originally thinking about doing seemed plain absurd and dumb.. hehe.. i guess practice makes perfect eh? most of the plans went out pretty smoothly except for a minor hiccup or two.. again id like to thank kuok shern (though i hate him :P) and wei lynn so so much for helping me out =)

mm.. i have this odd feeling of despair in my mind.. just a little.. i used to think that i could communicate quite well with people.. to exchange thoughts.. blabla.. at least when subjected to normal conditions.. have you ever been in a baad situation which is becoming worse.. and anything you try to do just ends up aggravating it.. although you mean well? then youd just feel like that.. its sort of like watching your house burn down.. flames that continue to burn away despite your desperate attempts to douse it with water.. sigh.. some might think using a different approach towards the problem would help.. some just sit it out.. it sucks :( ahh.. enough rambling for now then.

weiyang.

2005-08-10T21:17:00.000+08:00

hey guys, yeah i know i havent updated in a while.. blah like nothing to write and stuff.. hehe. so yeah here i am in the midst of the SPM trial 1!! ooohh.. ahhhh another 5 more days to go.. its weird how this exam seems shorter.. they crammed all the papers together.. so its non stop exams from 8am - 3.40pm. my brain is slagging already from all the crap written over the past 2 days, almost 20 pages of full scalp paper! ahaha.. oh yeah.. also i have taken the liberty to do this for the convenience of fellow spm takers out there.. a much more simplified version of the spm timetable:

http://www30.brinkster.com/solace88/spm.jpg (beware - not for the faint hearted!)

hmm.. whatt elsee.. oh yeah! the jazz fest is going to be on this weekend as well.. im planning on going(despite trials xP).. its damn nice to just sit there and enjoy the excellent music.. the only thing thats gonna stop me is the friggin haze.. damn my eyes are hurting and red already.. im hoping that when i ask yv shes going to agree.. but chances aree .. ... hehehe.. aiyy.. oh well i better go rest .. dohh /sleep

2005-07-17T17:49:00.000+08:00

i'm boreed.. its sunday.. i just played enough wc3 games to make my eye sore! ahhhh.. heehe.. better get to that homework pile soon.

ooh..guess what? im a grade B3 nerd!! hoho ho ho.

i think that by now i've mastered all forms of public transport already; to DU/DJ, taman megah, OU, midvalley, lrts.. haha yes direct your questions about this to me mortals!

here's an interesting pic displaying malaysian driving attitude.. something we're famous for;

*taken from BSC

as for personal experience, i recall walking back one day from pusat bdar.. while i was crossing the road this malay dude in a proton fingered me in a matter-of-factly fashion and proceeded speeding off, spewing exhaust at me.. haha what a lame-o..

this is a huge contrast compared to drivers in other countries.. take europe for instance.. where no speed limits need to be enforced and all drivers use their own rational discretion to decide how they should drive. the nation has among the lowest road accident deaths in the world!

considering our road/driving ethics, its amazing how some malaysians have driving licenses in the first place.. harhar rest assured that mua does not fall in the category above.. another 5 months + till independance! :)

2005-07-11T23:26:00.000+08:00

hey people.. the start of a new week: monday. i never thought id ever really go through one of those "monday blues".. of course i do feel quite lazy and tired to begin the usual routine sometimes.. but not those days where everything seems bad/wrongg..

so here i go into school and the day starts off innocently enough.. later on however something pretty bad doess happen.. well to cut a long story short; an incident just waiting to happen that did despite being forewarned earlier which involved two parties where one was a little too sensitive and the other the opposite.. haha lost you there didn't i?

anyway i head off to jamming with the band after school looking like shit.. damn the studio was super funky.. forgot whats it called already, but siti nurhaliza comes there to make her recordings! woot. the jamming experience was pretty fun..we were better than last week.. it reminded me of the times during form4 with hann, jiawei and stuff.. out in the city, carefree, walking around aimlessly, chat sessions in the mamak.. mmm..

so after the jamming session i take bus 21c back due to unforeseen circumstances.. wasnt easy squeezing in the crowded bus lugging my guitar around.. heres a pic i took

after that i had to freaking walk back with the guitar.. for about 20 mins.. got back pretty half dead to find my aussie sis back. whatta day huh? till the next post .

2005-06-29T22:39:00.000+08:00

i'm listening to the music of lecture again from mum, as usual. she claims how frustrated/sick she is, how she does her best and that no one bothers.. how unfair life treats her and etcetra. its amazing how she could even conjure up such thoughts when the fact is that she is among the upper class of society, leading a fairly luxurious life. owning a property in prime lands, a family, having all the bills taken care of, resources to spend and such are things that people work their entire lives out for! yet, she obstinately remains with her old mindset of obsessiveness over small things and self centredness.

sighh.. well enough about that.. its pretty ironic how much i feel as her. i resent it.. our biology teaches us about the ecosystem and how the first forms of life in a particular habitat are succeeded later on as the former said lifeforms alter the ecosystem, rendering it unsuitable for their own needs after a certain period of time and die off. the successor species are significantly different and able to adapt to the new changes in that enviroment. ecological succession.

nature's way of keeping things going round, and i think id probably need something of the sort, a change.. of perception .

wtfz

2005-06-24T22:27:00.000+08:00

i'm under quitee alot of pressure right now.. thanks to my mum again. i have to say she plays a really fucking big role in my life. for instance, she's never failed to make me feel as insignificant and unimportant as ever whenever i needed it.. yes thats right boys and girls, dont encourage and praise your child! instead diss them for any minor wrong doing! and when they actually get something right, just turn your head around pretend not to notice in hopes that they'll instinctively keep repeating such acts.

not only that, she also has much to say about what i do or partake in.. for instance guitars; although she was the one who got me enrolled in the first place (for the wrong reasons probably) , eventually i was pretty much uh.. on my own, handicapped in fact. she refers to my enthusiasm as a complete waste of time that could be better spent on reading textbooks (?!) .. and does not understand the difference between types of guitars thinking their all the same.

its not that i can't get along with other people(other parents even!).. in fact some of them think im pretty decent! bah.. i don't know whats wrong here, but we're definitely on very different wavelengths...

2005-05-31T18:04:00.000+08:00

helo guys.. haha haven't updated for a month now! lol. well anyway exams are over and I'm pretty much looking forward to the holidays(despite it being cut by half due to extra classes).. which i've already did enjoy quite abit over the past weekend.. :)

anyway i feel pretty inspired to write something on my mind.. so here goeees :

she stood gazing out by the window,
thinking of what she had done
or what hadn't been

cold wind on her naked skin,
whisking her hair to and fro
across a face of forlorn..

stark and blase she was,
oblivious to all attention
muted to the voice crying out deep within..

her eyes vague yet unerringly
set towards the dimming rays of the Sun
hoping, wishing, praying;

how could such a beautiful thing seem as so,
one would never know..

mixed feelings..

2005-05-07T00:07:00.000+08:00

heyoo guys,

well its been the end of a pretty eventful day, but before i go on to that i may as well talk about the prefects camp first! this year's camp was handled less by us and more by the facilitators at genting (yeah we went to the same place again).. as we didnt have as much time to spare as we did last year.. had alot of activities.. enjoyed most of them i guess.. i like jungle trekking! muahaha.. also had some quantum education talk thingy which was quite an eye opener.. haha.. and during the 2nd night all hell broke loose with a certain someone starting a foodfight with the cake we had for our prefectorial board.. it was crazy i tell you!!.. seeing people you'd least suspect of so much as to hurt a fly practically running around berzerkly with the manic glint in their eyes and cake in their hands.. haha this reminds me of those wc3 games; where shamans casting bloodlust on the orcs.. lol okay enough enough..

and today.. yeah headed to bangsar.. collected an item.. and walked back to my place! crap man its even worse than from hartamas.. hands on learning of the bernoulli's principle, where the cars went past me so fast i could actually feel the pull towards the road.. lol.. then reached home had a bite and .. cleaned the pool! haha that chore is a serious workout man.. after doing it ill be like as tired as anything.. even more since i just had a stroll earlier!

mm, then i headed to ironwood.. the new shipments of all the bc rich guitars just came in.. they were just fantastic la.. i mean, i may not be able to fully appreciate the guitars and stuff.. but even any tomdickandharry would know that these guitars just oozed quality and class, these guitars would kick the ass of any other guitar youd find in ANY other guitar store.. seriously .
oh yeh! donny got his **NJ warlock**.. omg its a damn good guitar at a kickass price.. happy for you man! and woot, i managed to convince my dad to get me the mockingbird as well! yay!...

rar.. so thats the end of today's post.. the midterm ain't too far off.. i have a bad feeling in the gut about it.. bah take care all!

2005-04-25T22:00:00.000+08:00

hellow! mmm things have been going pretty okay so far.. just a lil caught up with work again as usual..

anyway, i feel like talking about guitars now.. since its been on my mind alot recently and stuff.. letsee.. electric guitar isn't half as easy as it looks! i can say that based on my own experience.. having played classical before. i really dont know how asses like rudy and matt are so fuggin good.. arrg.. its not that i dont TRY excelling in it.. but my parents arent exactly super supportive.. it took me ages to convince my dad to purchase my raimundo classical in mid 2003.. and that just bore a price tag of like 1.4k, which i also helped to subsidise! so after that guitar took me as far as i could go, my dad refused to get a concert guitar for me.. understandable i guess since those carry very very heavy price tags (8k-17k!) so yeah rudy being a kind soul lent me his guitar which really helped alot.. yep its that sexy one down here

nevertheless, it was inevitable that my classical career was coming to an end.. i could never hold on to that guitar forever.. so when another potential student came along around end 2004, the guitar was passed to him.. partly my decision anyway.. i was losing interest due to lack of supportiveness, inspiration.. blabla

argh.. and even now my dad refuses to get me an electric!! its like a decent bc rich mockingbird platinum series being sold off at discount price due to stock clearance.. around 2k (yes im using an electric from my teacher yet again!) damn.. i really envy those peeps whose parents really support them through their entire guitar career thing.. the guitars you use(especially the first one) plays a MAJOR role in developing the skill and talent of an individual.. it makes it a whole lot easier for the kid to improve and all aside from relying on raw talent alone.. sigh!

well thats enough of ranting.. anyways.. april's drawing to a close already.. can safely say its been a better month than march haha.. oooh! and tomorrow's the 26th! :)

good night everybody!

2005-04-16T00:59:00.000+08:00

dang havent had a chance to update much this week.. hoho might as well start; received the certificates of participation for debate.. which were seriously the cheapskaty-est certs i have ever got! LOL.. i mean come on.. even for some unknown thingies i go for they provide better certs (i.e. with those cute ribbons on the top left hand corner) haha.. i could imagine the conversation that went on while they prepared the certs

tues, 30mins before assembly
mrs ong : so what announcements are there today?
secretary : oh nth much.. open day,clear desks before leave sch(!?), ict certs
mrs ong : omg!!1 teh debate certs are not ready!
secretary : oh noes!
mrs ong: get some of those old letterheads and put their names on them!! and uh.. wrap up notepads to give em'

lol. well thats for debate.. hmm what else.. oh yeah! i got the googoodolls - live in buffalo album.. the best 50 bucks ive ever spent on an album ever!! their performance on the dvd rocked!!!! woooot.. yeah addmaths is hard, dont understand how ppl find joy in doing it..

uhh goodnight. heh

2005-04-08T02:13:00.000+08:00

phoosh! its been a long long week! haha the debate results are; 2 wins and 1 loss
we didnt manage to make it to the semi finals (thank god..)..ill probably go into detail on that later.
so yeah.. classes resumed as usual and ive missed out on quite alot since last week.. argh!

just managed to complete all the homework (tons and tons) due for tomorrow.. such a relief! thanks yv for your books, it saved my life! :P

now for some well-earned rest .

dee bayt

2005-04-03T23:15:00.000+08:00

greetings again.. im here as the eve from the day dr. cq teo's kdu debate is coming to a close.. gaahh.. we dont even know why we're taking part.. srikdu was actually not supposed to send in a team due to lack of debaters.. but due to some miscommunication and.. forceful convincing on the schools part, here lies the bunch of four of us here frantically preparing for this event over the past week(even the weekends!@!)..

on such short notice, theres only so much we would be able to acheive.. but i quoteth ms ong "owh just try your best, it doesnt matter if you guys win or not!..". i admit that it did sound pretty encouraging during that time.. but when you actually get your feet wet its a different story all together.. but i guess it was pretty fun as well la.. like during the weekends we went on to an all out eating-spree(hoho.. school sponsoring our meals) and even managed to squeeze in a practical driving lesson :).. it was interesting to watch how buhleen and leean eat chicken. xD

oyh yeah, thanks shern and ian for taking the time to listen last thursday, what yous guys said was pretty insightful.. meh

till the next time then.

sleeepy

2005-03-28T01:02:00.000+08:00

well just as the heading says, im pretty beat right now.. gonna head to bed right after dumping my thoughts here before i forget them first thing in the morning.. oh but first.. thanks to jia wei and family for the generous hospitality over the past few times ive been here! =)

right here goes.. im sure every single one of you out there has had some form of experience like this; it starts off with a sort of trigger situation which involves you.. these vary in nature.. and then you start feeling awkward/confused/embarassed/hesistant, like hey, of ALL the things, this shouldnt be happening..(eg: why is he/she being like that? is it something im doing/didnt do?).. when instead it should be like THIS - [insert scene of gollum retrieving the one-ring-to-rule-them-all] and you repeatedly tell yourself this in hope that things will automagically fix themselves as the situation progresses.. (DENIAL)

after watching yourself get fsk-ed.. the after effects start sinking in.. that icy-sharp stabbing feeling smack right middle in the chest (havent found the proper words to fully describe this yet), the remorse of taking a particular action, the loss of mood or interest generally ...etc (these vary depending on your situation) which just plaaain sucks big time.

i think that life is all about looking for those oppurtunities (plenty of them mind you).. taking the risks.. and making the leap before its too late. you may never know when you might come across that chance ever again..

sigh.. where is your heart?

sports daay

2005-03-25T18:11:00.000+08:00

hoho, t'was sports day today.. blalala the usual stuff; march past, cheerleading, running events.. i still feel that kdu's sports day is lacking the grand splendor of a true sports event.. compared to ordinary goverment schools. despite all the preparation and training, the final results were still very mediocre.. well.. in all but the actual sport events itself.. there are quite a number of veryvery talented athletes of varying classes.. and a large percentage of them are in blue house.. which led to blue's inevitable victory through sheer brute strength (i can hear it ringing in my head.. "m-m-m-monsterr kill" haha). nevertheless, cheerleading is definitely an event not to be missed.. which quite a number govt. schools lack due to their uhh.. "conservativeness". heh . so anyway red house wins hands down.. you definitely wont find cheerleading of that potential just anywhere.. blue house comes close as well!

a number of sport events were actually held before today itself.. this included the long distance events which i **actually** took part in.. aksjfakjdfasd got my ass handed to me bigtime.. sigh oh well.. i should just stick to nerd-like things now. in fact, if im not mistaken, noone in my family actually has ever been an athlete of some sort, at least up till my grandfathers line. all my aunties and uncles never really took part in anything.. save one of my uncles who was in highjump. my cousins were academically gifted and actively participated in curricular stuff.. but stayed away from sport events.. gah, why do i bother.. even the genes are against me! haha

did i mentioned i passed my undang undang already? well i DID! hah in your face foo's! now let me drive your car :)

2005-03-21T17:21:00.000+08:00

bah. headache. plenty of uncompleted homework. not working panadol. irritable; no events on wednesday but now suddenly theres a bloody physics thing. why? retaking undang ON wed. yes i failed, and thanks to my good friends now the whole world knows.. haha.

being summoned by she-who-mustnt-be-named. i fear the worst.

2005-03-17T23:20:00.000+08:00

i shall begin by uhhm.. dedicating the song Alicia Keys - Karma to myself.. haha.. the past few weeks have been mostly accidents and pure bad luck.. a couple more days would make it a whole month!! haha sigh.. well whatever cant kill me..~~will make me stronger~~ probably still wont for the next few years.. :P

ohh and while i was on a bus recently, there was this mean-shorthaired-notsotall-indian lady with a great loud booming voice who was being totally inconsiderate towards the bus driver.. it was this chinese bus driver guy who had linguistic difficulties with english i guess.. even more so with the weird pronouced slang which this lady had. so yeah i was watching this lady trying to converse with the man.. who obviously didnt really understand what she was saying.. and there was some confusion on where she wanted to be dropped off.. she kept on repeating in a matter-of-factly bossy tone "drop me in front there.. not here.. IN front there!" while frantically pointing in a random direction.. goddamn lady, you're freakin taking a public transport vehicle.. the bus driver isnt your freaking driver! gah. lol and ive also come to a conclusion that all bus drivers know each other.. today the bus driver on the triton bus just winded down his window and started talking to a metro bus driver.. woot. heh well enough about my bus ranting.. i guess thats enough for tonight.. hehe

2005-03-15T23:25:00.000+08:00

muaha.. today has been quite productive, and tiring.. gah.. dad woke me up at around 6.30-ish to leave for the JPN building thing in PJ.. barely had uhh.. 3 hours of sleep.. heh heh.. so whoosh whoosh off i go.. there was already a short queue ahead when i arrived.. bah the counters opened almost an hour late.. so after collecting my new id i went off for something light to eat.. haha lonerisms to the max.. ALONE in the mamak.. sad.. xD

hmm hmm.. so then i wander around PJ looking for the lrt station.. the one next to a&w newtown.. haha after asking for directions from friendly townsfolk, boarded and went to kl sentral.. that place seriously resembles an airport.. and reminds me so much of the Terminal.. woh i really like that show! then after that a triton back to home.. haha.. public transport rules.. ill have to write sth about that some time in the future.. muahaah

blehs.. and now im rushing through the undang-undang questions.. which have many errors in them. gah.. so until the next post then!

welcome!

2005-03-14T21:41:00.000+08:00

ta-da! i've finally gotten round to making a blog of my own.. with assistance from my sis, whos more familiar with this stuff.. haha.. for once i was actually in need of her help :P

hmm.. lets see.. i went to a cool career/university talk thingie yesterday in mandarin hotel.. along with shern.. heh heh public transport all the way.. god you gotta love the men and women who serve the country by driving the buses and operating the trains in kl. ive only truly learnt how to appreciate the public transport system (despite its ocassional ineffectiveness) after not being able to get around much with my mum anymore.. sigh long story on that. so yeah we arrived at mandarin hotel spending only a total of rm2.60 each and attended the talk.. which was pretty informative in my opinion. afterwards a gang of us went to klcc.. heh heh.. waste more time as usual.. we caught a series of unfortunate events at tgv.. pretty interesting, id recommend it!

today was rather uneventful, was supposed to be in school for extra class.. arg but the temptation of blissful sleep was too hard to resist.. so yeah i get up just in time for lunch woot! .. and proceeded to study for the driving test which is coming up this wednesday. it should be cheesecake to pass, just look at the amount of *ahem* responsible drivers on malaysian roads now anyway.. lol.. but i didnt get much done anyway, bloody cough&cold annoying me to the end of my nerves!! argar.. ill get back to it tonight.

so anyway, this blog shalleth be my sanctuary against the infide-.. haha.. i mean ill be updating my blog pretty often i guess.. after taking into account the amount of time i spend online everyday.. so check back often guys!